All this talk of getting old…

Control yourself, take only what you need from it.
MGMT – Kids 

her: lo percaya gak gw udah gak perawan?
me: Maksudnyeeeeeee???
her: Yaa..gitu.
me: Sama siapa?
her: Sm *****
her: Waktu itu
me: Diem lo
her: Lo gak percaya ya?
me: Hymen lo?
me: Apaan sih lo
her: Ya terserah lo sih
me: Apaan sih lo!
her: gw kan cuma bilang. Krn gw blm cerita 
me: Ga lucu
her: Loh apa sih?
her: Jadi gmana ya
me: Kapan?yg dulu lo nelfon gw dikamar?
me: Atau yg terakhir ini?
her: Iya
her: Yg di kamar
her: hahaa sebelum lo marah, its april mop baby!!!
me: SETANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN 

**

That was a stupid YM conversation between me and my stupid best friend. She tricked me on April Fool’s Day saying she’s lost her virginity to someone who is not Mr. Right in any way, observed from any angle (okay, hot bod, but that’s it *wipes drool*). Now that I think about it, it was so stupid and naive of me to have believed in such a lie. But blame “QLCfor making her bring up all the “having sex and losing virginity” subject NONSTOP.. It just felt so possible that time -_-

Later on she asked, “What would you do if it were true, that I had lost my virginity to him that night?”

I thought for a while. What would I do? Should I be doing anything? It’s her life, her hymen she’s messing around with, why should it have anything to do with me, even if I am one of her closest and best friends?

“Well, I’d feel sorry for you, and be thankful that it didn’t happen to me.”

Sounds mean and heartless maybe. But if that were the question, then that is exactly what I would do. Another story if the question was: “What would you do if I went into deep depression and self hatred afterwards?”

If so, I’d give a more sympathetic answer, such as: “Well, I’d feel sorry for you, and be thankful that it didn’t happen to me… But I’ll be available 24/7 in case you need me!” *hugs2 kiss2*

We don’t live long enough to experience ALL the mistakes in life. So we learn from other’s wrong steps, their misfortunes, their failures. I guess that’s why we constantly need our friends, other people around us. One of the reasons is to learn from them, and share each other’s success and stupidity.

I surely have done some intentional mistakes in life. Irrational and stupid ones. Those dearest ones tried to remind me but I kept ignoring, saying: I know this is not right, but I just have to do it anyway, and maybe I can learn from it.

Now when I tell them: “Okay, I’ve had enough. No more suicidal plans in the name of earning more experiences“, some raise their eyebrows: “Are you sure you’ve had enough? At this age?”

Maybe I’m not yet completely old and wise (hey, aren’t that supposed to be our grandparents sitting on rocking chairs telling us stories from their youth??)… but looking at all this emo, dramatic, volatile trend…

You are the last drink I never should drunk.
You are the body hidden in the trunk.
You are the habit I can’t seem to kick.
You are my secrets on the front page every week.
You are the car I never should have bought.
You are the train I never should have caught.
You are the cut that makes me hide my face.
You are the party that makes me feel my age.
Like a car crash I can see but I just can’t avoid.
Like a plane I’ve been told I never should board.
Like a film that’s so bad but I’ve gotta stay til the end…

Pulp – Like A Friend

…I hope I truly have had enough. Never again. No more of those stupid drinks, bodies, habits, secrets, cars, trains, cuts, or parties. Amin.

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